Tuesday, July 31, 2012

Single Girl Swag: The Dog Days aren't Over

If you're curious what this series is, check back here and see the intro :)

For those that know me, it's no secret that I'm pretty much in love with my dogs. They literally fill my entire instagram and tumblr feed.... anddd pretty much every other social media outlet that I am on as well.

There's JJ, my first born, who stays with his grandparents in Oklahoma! He's by far one of the best parts about going home :)  

Then there's Jackson! Once I realized JJ didn't like college life too much, I decided I needed ((yes needed)) another furry best friend to have with me. Best decision ever. He brings so much love and happiness into my world!

How typical, right? Single girl and her dog(s).

Anyway, not too long ago a friend that used to live in Fayetteville text me to say hello! It'd been ages since I'd heard from him so, I was stoked to catchup and hear how he was doing. During the middle of our conversation he openly (and boldly) confessed to have had a crush on me back when he lived here a few years ago.

WHAT?! News to me.

I asked him why he never spoke up and told him that he should have... I mean ya never know, right?
Then this happened.
--No, his name isn't really sparky. Yes, it's an annoying name I call people sometimes.


Of course I couldn't stop laughing, because I mean he's right! Jackson does get all my loving.

And ya know, I'm OK with that! I firmly believe when the right "one" comes along, both me and my puppies will have no problem sharing the love.

Until then, I think I will stick to laughing at my own stereotype and jamming out to this good ol' Carrie Underwood hit! It probably should be my new ringtone.


Monday, July 30, 2012

Go World.

After seeing this commercial 10 times in the last few days, I've decided:  I'm going to need to force one of my children to be so good at a sport they make it to the Olympics.

It needs to be sort of an under-the-radar sport.  Not gymnastics or swimming or track - those fields are too saturated and popular.  It's going to need to be something like fencing, or skeet shooting, or badminton.  Whatever it is, I'm going to start my kid young, and get myself a ticket to the Olympics.  It's going to be awesome.  Olympics 2036.  Watch for me.  Everyone reading this should make their kids do it too, and then we can all go together!

I love when the Olympics comes around because it reminds me how much I love America.  And even more so:  it reminds me how much I love the entire world.  Politics and history and wars are set aside for some good old-fashioned athletic competition, and it never ceases to be simply incredible.

Okay, spill:  What's your favorite sport to watch, favorite athlete so far, or favorite Olympic uniform?  (Mine are:  swimming, the OKC Thunder trio or Gabby Douglas, some cycling guy who had a neon blue and yellow uniform and a neon orange bike)

Friday, July 27, 2012

Through the Lens: shades of green

Welcome to my new photo series, Through the Lens!  I'm always looking for new projects, especially ones that will push me to use my DSLR camera even more, so the photo series was born.

I'm reading Outliers by Malcolm Gladwell and in the book he states that putting in 10,000 hours of practice is a prerequisite for great achievement...

So, here's to logging many many more hours behind the camera!  Great achievement is right around the corner, right?!

Thursday, July 26, 2012

White Collar: More Than Just White Noise

Friends, family, children of all ages... I have found a new love and that is, White Collar.

I have to say I'm completely shocked at this new found Netflix obsession. You see, I have to have some sort of small noise when I study; radio, tv, etc. Because if not, my mind just drifts and wanders and before you know it, 30 minutes has gone by and I don't know where I'm even at or what I'm doing. The noise helps soothe and calm my nerves and eases me into my reading and homework assessing.

That is precisely what I thought White Collar would be when I first started it on Netflix a few weeks ago. Noise. Boy, was I wrong! This has become one of my favorites! I'm not sure if it's because Matt Bomer could possibly be the most beautiful human being I've ever seen? 

Or, the show itself is actually good (maybe both?!) but I cannot get enough! I'm a few episodes in and White Collar has moved from "noise" status to front and center-first-choice tv show to watch-status. 

It's not the most intense or sweaty palms kind of show like Downton Abbey or Friday Night Lights, but man it still just grabs ya and won't let go! It's cheesy, predictable, and completely unrealistic. So obviously I love it!

I feel like it's a perfect summer show! I highly suggest you give it a go and swoon over Matt's piercing, hypnotizing, mesmerizing, baby blues. Don't get too excited though, world! Matt's been happily taken with kiddies for a good while now. Still, it's always nice to appreciate a good painting, even if you can't take it home with you. ;)

Did I mention Kelly Kapowski is in it as well?! All grown up and glam as ever! It's great.

Have I mentioned I love this show?

Wednesday, July 25, 2012

This Is a Story About Shoes

This is also a story about bad decisions and getting tricked by celebrities.

Do you guys know about the Mints?  ShoeMint, StyleMint, HomeMint, JewelMint, etc.?  Basically, they are online retail "clubs" that have new products every month.  You join the club, and then each month you check out what's new, and decide if you want to buy something.  I belong to all the Mints.  Mostly because they are celebrity-endorsed and, well, that is a marketing strategy that works well on me.

This is a story about ShoeMint.

ShoeMint's celebrity is Rachel Bilson.  She's actually the cutest person on the planet (and Heidi is her doppleganger).  I trust her choice in footwear.

the shoes i can't resist.
When I saw these shoes, I knew these were the ones.  They were striped and sort of French-looking and had a perfectly pointed toe.  They would be the ones to properly induct me into the ShoeMint club.  I immediately ordered a pair in my regular size.

I imagined running into Rachel Bilson on the street someday.  We would both be wearing our striped black and white flats from ShoeMint.  She would compliment my style.  I would ask her what it's like to kiss Jason Street on Hart of Dixie.  We would probably high-five at some point.  I would be approximately 12 inches taller than her.  It was going to be great.

The shoes arrived.  I tried them on.  They fit, but they fit just right.  Like, if they were a half a millimeter smaller, they would be too small.  "My feet are just swollen!"  I thought.  "It's hot and I just got home from work for the day, and in the morning when my feet are back to normal, these will be just fine!"  I planned an entire outfit around these shoes for the next day.

In the morning, I got dressed, pulled out my beautiful flats, slipped them on, and was out the door, imagining how many compliments I was going to get today!

Half a block later, my heels were screaming in pain as the backs of the shoes ripped off all of my skin.  We're talking blood here.

When I got to work, I immediately took off the shoes, partly to bandage up my raw heels, and partly to look at the soles of the shoes.  It was too late.  The damage had been done.  They were sufficiently scuffed and had some sort of New York City street remnants on them that there was no way I could return them.  DANG YOU RACHEL BILSON.

I was left in a tough position.  They were no longer returnable (and were $79 in the first place[!]).  But Rachel Bilson told me to buy them.  They are very slightly too small.  But Rachel Bilson told me to buy them.  What's a girl to do?

Well, this girl decided she was going to have to wear them anyway.  I'm training my feet to accept that they are going to be in these shoes, and be slightly more crammed than comfortable.  I've been weaning myself from BandAid use and slowly building up callouses in the right places on the backs of my heels.  I've been sprinkling enough baby powder in them each time I wear them to keep my feet dry and cool, because if my feet swell up even the tiniest bit, it's over.

And it's working!  I can make it through a whole day without BandAids now, and even though when I take my shoes off when I get home, I leave a little trail of baby powder footprints across the floor, I'm okay with it.  Because when you buy way-too-expensive shoes that don't actually fit but you keep them instead of returning them because you love them too much and also there is a chance you'll see Rachel Bilson one day and be shoe twins with her...you have to make it work.

Does anyone else sacrifice their feet for fashion?  Please reassure me that I'm not the only one who does things like this.  Please...

Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Nakie Time

I haven't had a roommate since the summer of 2009. Sure, I'm married so I don't live alone, but a husband is different than a roommate. Because of our unique crazy life (we move every three months for his rotations) we also have a unique living situation. 

When we were living in Phoenix we lived with my aunt. No biggie. It was fun. She's family, she's responsible, she's an adult, she's awesome.. I could go on, but you get it. It was fun.

Currently we are in Denver and we have another roommate. It so happens that one bedroom furnished short term rentals are a lot more expensive than two bedroom places. We live with one of my husband's classmates who works at the same place. This living situation has been a little more difficult than our previous. Okay, a LOT more difficult, and has been challenging. But I'm not here to complain (I'll save that for later).

What I am here to say is that our roommate was out of town a few weeks ago for four days and IT WAS THE BEST TIME IN THE PAST TWO MONTHS WE HAVE HAD!!! Let's just say I hate putting on pants to get a glass of water. Also wearing a bra (I don't even need one my boobs are size child anyway) to grab a bowl of cereal is so annoying. It's almost like I have become Tobias from Arrested Development. A NEVER-NUDE!

But not for those four, glorious days. We were basically our own nudist colony. TMI? Who cares. It was awesome. 

No roommate for four days, people!!! FOUR DAYS!!! I didn't wear pants or a bra (or much of anything else if you know what I mean, bow chicka bow wow...). We lounged on the couch, watched whatever television we wanted, left our dirty dishes around (okay no, I didn't, but I could have and not cared), and had sex. Yes, we had sex everyday and it was awesome. It's way more difficult to do with a roommate in the house.

It was just what we needed. Four days of just us. All you married people who live alone with no kids or roommates... That's the life. Enjoy it.

We say that our roommate is preparing us for having children in the house. And if kids are anything like roommates, we are not ready. At all.

When do the parents ever have sex?

Monday, July 23, 2012

Congratulations Bachelornation Love

It's no surprise we love all things Bachelor around here (and we're not sorry either) so from all of us we want to send a big group hug to Emily and Jef.

Jef stole our hearts the moment he rolled in on a skateboard (and then tossed it in the bushes). We knew he was perfection with his hipster hair and skinny jeans.

Here's to hoping they have a live televised wedding one day!

Friday, July 20, 2012

Music Stuff: Break Up Songs

We've all been there:  when a relationship ends, no matter who dumped who, the greatest remedy is pouring out your heart (and tears) to the strains of an break up song.  None of us are going through break ups right now (thank goodness!), but that doesn't mean we can't jam out all the same.  Enjoy!  And if you shed a few tears, we won't tell.

"End of the Road" by Boyz II Men
The number of times I have listened to this song while simultaneously driving, screaming all the lyrics, and crying is probably uncountable.  There's nothing like a good slow jam with a sexy-low-talking part in the middle and lyrics like "I can't let go/It's unnatural/You belong to me/I belong to you" to really get those emotions flowing.  Also:  hand claps.

"Why" by Avril Lavigne
There isn't an official video so enjoy the fan-made lyric video.
This song never made it to radio so it's a miracle anyone found it. This became my girlfriends and I's break up song in high school, circa 2001. We would drive around and listen on repeat. At about 2 minutes and 50 seconds is when we would turn it up even louder and really let the emotions flow... However, I  dated the same guy for 3 years in high school so I actually just jumped on the bandwagon and pretended I was broken hearted... until later...

"Where I stood" by Missy Higgins
Each of my breakups had a song associated; I remember all the songs so clearly too, especially ones during the crying-hysterically-on-the-floor-because-my-life-is-over-forever breakups (college years were rough in the boy department!).  But one was different -- after a year and a half it just "wasn't working" anymore.  And this song speaks it perfectly; I had lost myself entirely, lost what I believed in and the dreams I wanted to achieve, and knew I had to end it .  Ah, Missy sings this one so well, isn't she great? 

"Starts with Goodbye" by Carrie Underwood
Oh man... When the girls and I started talking about this post, SO.MANY.SONGS. came to my mind. Truly, it's a bit ridiculous how many times I've said in my lifetime, "this song totally reminds me of ...." or "this song is EXACTLY how I feel!" My poor friends, they had to have hated me and all my heart ripped apart songs. So many were big in my life though, I didn't know how I would chose just one. However, I have to say that out of all the other songs, this one has got me through not one, but TWO gut-wrenching relationships. Every single word, even to this very day, represents how I was feeling at the time or phase in time that the drama was unfolding. I STILL think it applies to my life today,  
"It's sad, but sometimes moving on with the rest of your life, starts with goodbye." 
Dang Carrie, it's just too good.

Thursday, July 19, 2012

Single Girl Swag: Introduction

OK, so I don’t really care for the word swag. I find it to be humorous actually. So when I say it, I’m not being serious. Also, I felt like #SingleGirlProbs was just soooo dramatic. 

And typical. 

So, that’s why we're going with Swag; because it’s funny....

and Singlehood is really funny.  

We all read the same posts about being “single”. 
They typically each fall under the umbrella of:
  • Independent women striving to find their identity
  • I’m doomed to walk this earth alone
  • Embrace where you’re at in life
  • The right one will come
  • I’m just going to be a lesbian

Either way, my documentation shall be none of those. I don't think anyway?
Instead, we’re just going to acknowledge the dare I say, ridiculous side of trying to figure out this little thing called love, singlism, and finding the beauty and humor of it all. 
Because let’s be honest, it’s pretty freaking hilarious.

So here’s to the blind dates, the attempts at matchmaking, the dreaded 'what do I say now' when on a date, the flying solo to events, the awkward 'so, are you dating anyone' question, the embarrassing daydreaming of cuddling and becoming F.B.O, the humiliating attempts at flirting, and all that “stuff”.

Let the learning and the laughter begin. 


Wednesday, July 18, 2012

What's in a Ring?

As a person who has literally lost her wedding ring, never to be found again, I've pondered quite a bit what exactly that ring symbolizes and how much stock should be put in the physical object itself.

My boyfriend-at-the-time-now-husband had a hard time finding me an engagement ring, because I apparently had once made it so clear that I wanted a pearl instead of a diamond, he was terrified of getting the wrong thing.  Eventually I just went to a jewelry store, picked out a ring, told a salesperson my name and the ring I wanted, and directed Scott which jewelry store to go to.  It all worked out in the end, and he proposed to me with that ring, perfect and unique, with a pearl at the center and diamonds on the sides.

We had only been married a year and a half when, on a trip to the emergency room (don't worry, I turned out alright!), I went to the bathroom and left my ring on the sink after washing my hands.  Almost two hours later, when I was finally being discharged, I realized what I had done.  Scott immediately ran back to that bathroom, but it was gone.  I swear to you, I mourned that loss like a death.  I couldn't believe I had been so careless with an object that meant so much.  The ring I said "yes" to, the ring I said "I do" to, the ring that bound Scott and I together.  I still feel a little bit sick just thinking of it.

Thankfully, Scott's family had an heirloom ring that they had planned to pass down to a future bride anyway, and that's what I inherited.  It's beautiful and vintage:  big circle cut center diamond, baguettes, 14k gold.  The wedding band is just a thin gold circle, gorgeous in its simplicity.  It's a ring that establishes family, history, trust, and love.  I've worn it for over a year, and am immensely grateful to my in-laws for entrusting me with such a precious object, so why do I still feel like it isn't mine?

I secretly dream (well, not so secretly anymore) that at some anniversary far down the line, Scott will present me with an exact replica of my first ring, the one I chose, the one that meant that he chose me, but what would that mean for the ring I have now?  Which ring, if either, is really mine?  Wouldn't a replica of the first ring, though the same in appearance, just be another empty replacement?  Could it possibly hold the same meaning that the ring had when he slipped it on my finger the very first time?

On the other hand, what does it even matter?  Though a ring is an outward symbol to the rest of the world of your commitment to another human being, not having one or having a different one or losing the first one doesn't change my commitment to my marriage or the meaning of my vows.  Does it matter which ring I wear?  Does it matter if I wear a ring at all, if I know what's in my heart?  Am I just a total brat for not appreciating wholeheartedly the beautiful ring that I now have?  Am I just asking all these questions to justify my horrible blunder to myself?!?!

Has anyone else out there ever lost their wedding ring?  What did you do about it?

(P.S.  I now have a very strict rule that I am only allowed to take my rings off ever if I put them in a white box on my nightstand, so at all times, they are either on my hand or in that box.  So far...so good.)

Tuesday, July 17, 2012

Look Ma, I made a Cobbler!

My mom is a whiz in the kitchen.  I noticed when I was a pretty young that she has this amazing ability to throw a meal together, a delicious meal, with no recipe or any planning.  She just did it.  Magic. 

I decided I wanted to make a cobbler the other day.  Granted, I had to look up a recipe (not quite to my mom's skill set yet), but I actually had all the ingredients on hand.  And I whipped it up.  And it was good!

  • pints raspberries
  • 1/3  cup  plus 1/4 cup granulated sugar
  • 1 1/2  cups  plus 1 tablespoon all-purpose flour
  • 2  teaspoons  baking powder
  • 1/4  teaspoon  kosher salt
  • 1  teaspoon  grated lemon zest
  • 6  tablespoons  cold unsalted butter, cut into pieces
  • 2  cups  heavy cream 

Heat oven to 375° F. In a shallow 1 1/2-quart baking dish or a 9-inch deep-dish pie plate, toss the blueberries, 1/3 cup sugar, and 1 tablespoon flour.

In a medium bowl, combine the baking powder, salt, lemon zest, and the remaining flour and sugar.

Add the butter and blend with your fingers or 2 knives until coarse crumbs form. Add 3/4 cup plus 2 tablespoons cream and mix until a shaggy dough forms.

Drop mounds of dough over the blueberry mixture. Bake until the berries are bubbling and the top is golden, 35 to 40 minutes. Serve with the remaining cream for drizzling, if desired. (it's desired, I promise!).


Monday, July 16, 2012

Gray Free.


I posted last week about how my gray hairs were getting out of control.

I am happy to announce that they are gone… for at least 6-8 weeks. Color doesn’t last longer than about 6 weeks on me. Whatever.

Thank you, husband for being my stylist.

Friday, July 13, 2012

The Woman at the Well & Me

Guys, I just read the story of the woman at the well for the first time since probably late elementary school.  It was so illuminating.  Mostly because, as it turns out, I'm exactly like her.

The story is found in John 4, and here's The Message version, which is sort of funny because Jesus gets sarcastic in it.  Read it over for a refresher, and see if you have any of the same things in common with Woman At The Well as I do:

1.  We're suspicious.  When strangers talk to me, I immediately go into I-will-cut-you-if-you-come-any-closer mode.  Woman At The Well was wary right off the bat too.  Jesus said, "Would you give me a drink of water?" (His disciples had gone to the village to buy food for lunch.)  The Samaritan woman, taken aback, asked, "How come you, a Jew, are asking me, a Samaritan woman, for a drink?" (Jews in those days wouldn't be caught dead talking to Samaritans.)

2.  We're judgy.  Upon first meeting, I tend to analyze everything someone says to see if I can use my first impression skills to decide on the spot if I like them or not.  Like I said, I'm judgy.  The woman said, "Sir, you don't even have a bucket to draw with, and this well is deep. So how are you going to get this 'living water'? Are you a better man than our ancestor Jacob, who dug this well and drank from it, he and his sons and livestock, and passed it down to us?"  AKA "Who do you think you are, boo?"

3.  We have pasts we're not proud of.  When you're talking to Jesus, there's not much you can hide...
He said, "Go call your husband and then come back."
"I have no husband," she said.
"That's nicely put: 'I have no husband.' You've had five husbands, and the man you're living with now isn't even your husband. You spoke the truth there, sure enough."  <--sarcastic Jesus!
I haven't had five husbands (thank goodness), but I did go through quite a slew of boyfriends before I finally found the right one.  WATW knows all about that.  She's been burned before:  abandoned, widowed, divorced, we don't know, but we can surmise that she knows what it's like to feel the pain of heartache.  I relate, completely.  The amazing part?  Jesus knows all about it, and totally puts her in her place about it.  I wish I had met up with Him sometime between boyfriends 6 and 7 and had the same conversation.

4.  We use smarts to prove people wrong.  Okay, I'm not really proud of this about myself, but I looooove to correct people.  It's awful.  Between grammar, pop culture knowledge, and directions, my corrections come out of my mouth before I even have a chance to stop them.  WATW is cut from the same cloth. "Oh, so you're a prophet! Well, tell me this: Our ancestors worshiped God at this mountain, but you Jews insist that Jerusalem is the only place for worship, right?"  She totally tries to put Jesus off by letting Him know she's got the knowledge on the Jews, okay?

5.  We get excited when we see famous people.  I live in one of the greatest cities in the world for celebrity spotting.  I keep my eyes peeled for them at all times, and I've been known to stalk reality stars.  When I have a sighting, I love to brag to people.  So does WATW!  Back in the village she told the people, "Come see a man who knew all about the things I did, who knows me inside and out. Do you think this could be the Messiah?"  She immediately went back to town and told everybody who she saw.  Bragging rights, people.  You gotta claim that.  If it had existed at the time, she would have Tweeted it.

6.  We needed to hear what Jesus had to say at the well more than we knew.  Of course, the entire point of this incredible encounter in the Bible is to share what Jesus told this woman, who was by all accounts a fallen woman and an undesirable.  Jesus tells her:  "It's who you are and the way you live that count before God. Your worship must engage your spirit in the pursuit of truth. That's the kind of people the Father is out looking for: those who are simply and honestly themselves before him in their worship. God is sheer being itself—Spirit. Those who worship him must do it out of their very being, their spirits, their true selves, in adoration."  Yep, that's the way God wants us.  As who we are.  Suspicious, judgy, slutty, smart-alecky, fame-hungry, whatever we were in the past and whatever we struggle with in the present.  It's the intention of our hearts that matters before Him.  Woman At The Well, homegirl, sister from another mister:  I feel so wholly comforted by these same words that were spoken to you.  I can bring my heart to lay down at His feet, and leave the rest at the door.  It's already been taken care of.

Thursday, July 12, 2012

My Guilty Pleasure

We all have them, right?  Almost all of my guilty pleasures revolve around TV shows.  I love TV.  Like, love love love it.

When I was growing up we didn't have cable.  So I had to make do with the network shows.  Thank goodness the 90s was filled with fabulous entertainment (Boy Meets World, Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, Full House, Step by Step...!).  Though the later years were great too, i.e. welcome reality TV.  My first taste of reality was not Real World like most of my peers, it was Big Brother.  My dad and I watched the show every week in the summertime. 

Throughout college, I would still call him to discuss the happenings of the most recent episode.  You guys, it gets wild, I'm telling you.  Lucky for me the show is still going strong!

(photos from cbs)

This season of Big Brother premiers tonight! It's so bad it's good, trust me. 

Wednesday, July 11, 2012

Look How Long This One Is

I found it first when I was a junior in college. I was 20 years old, dealing with a broken heart and I couldn’t believe I was old enough, definitely not mature enough, for what I had just seen. 

A gray hair. On my head.

I have always been a worrisome child and that anxiety has followed its way intomy adult life. So it actually is strange that I didn’t find any grays sooner... ya know because of the rumored gray hair myth. Stress = Grays. And also Uncle Jessie’s (from Full House) saying, if you pluck a gray hair, 2 will grow back in its place. I semi believe this.

I have colored my hair since I was in high school so I technically have always been fighting this cause. Sometimes it’s a Wal-Mart box style dye, and when I’m feeling fancy (aka my mom treats me) I get it professionally colored. But currently, our finances are not allowing the luxury option, and my grays are out of control.

In my defense I do have dark hair, so they show up more. I’m sure you blondes out there have tons of them too, so ha!

As much as I hate them, I love them. It’s a game I play when I’m getting ready. The hunt. Mostly my grays hang out underneath so no one really sees unless I point them out. Which I do. Because they are awesome.  It’s amazing how fast they grow I’m always yelling at my husband “LOOK HOW LONG THIS ONE IS” Which I guess if someone just heard me yell that would be odd...

Am I the only one who is a 20 something female with this problem? Are the little gray monsters only finding me?

weekend I will be saying bye to my annoying grays and training my husband to box dye my hair.

Tuesday, July 10, 2012

The Over-Committer

For as long as I can remember, making other people happy has been one of my top priorities. I cannot say exactly why or if there was a specific situation that sparked this desire, it's just always been apart of who I am. I pride myself on being someone that will do anything and everything for my friends. To say it has been one of the greatest blessings in my life, being there for those I love, would be an understatement.

On that note, this trait has definitely led to some of my most stressful and trying situations as well.
You see, I have a little trouble deciphering balance; balance between the yes's and the no's, the study time and the play time, my job and my workouts, time for friends and time for myself, eating healthy and unhealthy... You get the idea. It just all comes down to balance.
And well.. I've just never been a very good balancer {No, that's not a real word but I'm using it anyway.} Sometimes I become too involved, the situation becomes too much, and/or I try to do too much, then something or someone suffers because of my inability to do all I've committed to do.

For example, earlier this summer, a friend's bachelorrette party was being held in another state about 5 hours away from me. For nearly two months I'd planned on going to this thing. I was really looking forward to it, as this friend and I have talked about her wedding for as long as I can remember. And again, it meant so much to me to be there for her and this special time in her life. Like I said, I'm very passionate about devoting myself to my friendships.

So you can imagine the dilemma I was in when I realized I was having severe complications between attending her party and balancing all the studying for my summer classes. You see, summer school is like a 6 week boot camp of information being constantly pounded in your head over and over and over. You can't get behind. Two summer class days are equivalent to an entire week during the normal school year. It's madness.

Well, I didn't realize how bad things were going to be time/stress wise until about a week before her party... I explained my concerns to her, but still said I would attempt to be there. Come the Wednesday afternoon before the event, I knew I wasn't going to be able to make it.

I was crushed; truly felt like the worst kind of friend. Obviously because I couldn't be there but also because I had let this friend down. This wasn't like a birthday party, these things don't happen all the time. On top of that, I was supposed to carpool with another friend down there as well. So, now that's two friends I let down.

I was a mess.

During this time, a friend reminded me of a verse that has really altered my ways of thinking and I wish I would have put it into application for this situation before things escalated to this level.

"Simply let your 'Yes' be 'Yes,' and your 'No,' 'No';
anything beyond this comes from the evil one."- Matthew 5:37. 

Powerful stuff right there. 

Both girls were very good with their reactions to my news. However, I knew deep down I had disappointed them and complicated their situations as well.

It was then that it really hit me how much my over committing and people pleasing can truly get out of hand and it affects more than just my life, but others as well. I realized then that I needed to get real with myself.

I am a busy person. Always have been, always will be, I'm sure. I need to learn to be honest with myself. (Basically, just cut the crap and get my shiz together).
Looking back, I wish I would have told both friends, "I'm in summer school so I can't give a definite answer, but if in anyway possible I can be there, I will!" Also, I should have known better than to involved someone else in my plans because then that complicates their standing; case in point, the friend I was supposed to carpool with.

This verse is something I'm going to strive to live by more often. For all those out there that have some of the same balance struggles and over committing issues, I encourage you to attempt this along with me!
  • As stated above, let your YES mean YES and your NO mean NO. 
    • Aka, Just say what you mean and be honest with both others and yourself.
  • Even though it's hard, try and I mean seriously try to find the BALANCE in life. 
    • Decide what's important and what's not and what takes priority over what.
  • REALLY think about a situation before you automatically say yes and commit to it. 
  • If you commit to something, just freaking DO it. 
  • When you are wrong, just admit it and don't make excuses; apologize, and try to move forward. 
    • But most importantly, LEARN from it.
  • You just can't do it all. And that's OK.

Monday, July 9, 2012

Sorry We're Not Sorry We Watch the Bachelorette

Today, Heidi and Valerie weigh in on the same topic:  watching The Bachelorette.  The issue isn't with the show itself, it's with everyone who wants to judge you on whether you watch it or you don't.  We've seen negativity come from all sides of this one, and we're tired of it!

If I hear or read one more person postulate on and on about their opinions of all the current antics on this season of The Bachelorette, only to then end it with "I can't believe I watch this show!" or "This show is so stupid, I don't know why I watch it" or even "I mean, I don't even care what happens"...I just might throw Chris Harrison's plate of roses on the ground and stomp on it.

Guess what, everyone?  You watch this show because you like it.  You do care what happens.  You find enjoyment and entertainment from watching week after week.


We all watch it for the very same reasons!

We love cheesy romance!

We love predicting who will stay and who will go week by week!

We love cringing when someone moves in for a kiss that is obviously not wanted!

We love drooling over all the gowns and sparkly shorts!

We LOVE Chris Harrison and his unpredictable tie/shirt combos!

We love believing in love (despite the obvious track record of couples from this show)!

Let's stop being embarrassed of things we like, and let's just like them, instead.  Guilty pleasures are meant to be shared, and there is absolutely no reason why we should hide that we enjoy them.  Turns out, sometimes we're just stereotypical women.  WHO CARES.  If you like it, own the fact you like it.  I promise, you are nowhere near alone.

I'll be watching tonight.  I'd love to talk about it with you later.

On the flip side of this same topic, what if you aren't ashamed of the fact that you watch it, but other people make it feel like you should be?  Heidi's experienced this one.

I have never ever been embarrassed or ashamed of what trashy TV I watch. As an avid TV go-er I have learned to handle the criticism of my [brilliant] choices. Some of my favorites include almost everything on the ABC Family Channel, E!, Bravo, and let's be honest, NBC, ABC, The CW, Fox, and shoot why not Lifetime, HGTV, Discovery Channel, TLC, and The History Channel. Okay, so I love TV. I am NOT ashamed of it. But I feel like right now it isn't "cool" to watch TV. Especially in Colorado, their are too many mountains to hike or trails to run, why would I spend so much time watching TV?

Because I love it dang it. 

My husband sometimes gives me a hard time (jokingly... I think) about watching too much TV. Yes, I probably do, but I don't care. It's not like I sit ALL day and watch TV. I'm active, I go to the gym, pool, and library, I read books, I leave the house, I have friends. Well the other day we were hanging out with some friends at our hosue. It was the first time meeting the girlfriend of one of the guys. I knew I had to be more careful about how much Kardashian references I made. It's not because I'm ashamed... it's because I don't want to always be "that girl" that's constantly talking about reality TV and celebrity gossip. With my group of girlfriends it's acceptable, it's encouraged, but outsiders I need to keep it to a minimum until I can assess the situation.

So with these friends we had already talked about hiking mountains, riding bikes, nutrition (why?), politics and who knows what else.... I interjected with some reality TV gossip. I was missing our Monday night girls watchparty of The Bachelorette to hang out with these people, they could show some respect. They didn't care. So I tried another celebrity rumor, I got eye rolls instead of "OMG! He did not say that to her!?" I mentioned something Kathy Lee and Hoda said on the Today Show (judge all you want, I don't have a job, so daytime television is my thing) and it was as if I just killed a puppy. They were disgusted with what I do in my spare time. The conversation went something like this....

Friend's Girlfriend: "If I didn't have a job I would go outside and hike mountains by myself every day instead of watching TV."
Me: "Well I don't want to hike a mountain by myself, I'll get lost."

Friends's Girlfriend" "I can't believe people would watch something so stupid as those 2 drunk ladies on the Today Show."
Me: "Well I watch it and don't care what you think." - okay I didn't say "I don't care what you think." I was thinking it though.

It was the FIRST time I have ever felt like maybe I shouldn't be sharing how much I love the entertainment industry. They were giving me a hard time, making fun of me (and maybe it was in a playful make fun of way, but that's not how it felt). I don't give them a hard time for eating only organic food, not showering, saying the F word, and wanting to sleep in a tent rather than a bed. I'm not making fun of their hobbies and what makes them happy. 

Why are they making fun of what I do? And why did it bother me so much? 

As a contestant on a cooking reality show, Master Chef, said "haters are my motivators".

It's a good thing I didn't mention my love of The Kardashian family or Bachelornation...

Lessons learned?  If you like something, don't be sorry about it; embrace it!  If you don't like something, but you're around someone else who does, give them a break!  We're all allowed to have different opinions and interests, and there's really no need for judging.

See, look how much we've learned from Bachelor-watching already!